monday morning mindfulness: the power of “at least”
I am so thankful for this online community & I want to be a little more intentional about chatting about things, encouraging one another, & reminding each other that many of us are probably feeling similar things, or have at different times. These monday morning mindfulness posts are going to be little glimpses into my heart & life: the good, the bad & the ugly. So much can be learned from different experiences, especially when you are practicing mindfulness.
With all of that being said, today’s topic is: the power of “at least”.
After years of health problems, in September, my mom finally received a diagnosis: ankylosing spondylitis. (A simple explanation is that it is an autoimmune disease where a form of arthritis attacks the spine & sometimes other joints).
She called me one day feeling totally & completely frustrated because she got a call that the medication her doctor recommended, a weekly injection would cost $6,682.78 for a one-month supply. While as a family we are all financially comfortable, I’m not sure who in the world could afford this?
My mom said she wasn’t calling for help, but simply because I do a really good job of making her feel validated when she’s frustrated about something. (I suppose this is a pretty good compliment considering I’m a middle school counselor & that’s kind of my job lol)! In the same coversation, we were talking about a man from our community that was recently diagnosed with a very aggressive cancer. After talking about how heartbreaking that is for him + his family, she said “well at least I don’t have that. It could be worse”.
(She is right, it could be worse & that would be hard. But, her situation is hard too). So, I quickly told her that & that just because someone else is going through something hard or even harder than you, it doesn’t make your own situation less hard. She was quiet for a while & I could tell she was really thinking about it. We talked about empathy & the words “at least” for a while & she ended by saying that this is the exact reason she calls me. I told her that I choose my words / phrases very carefully because words have power & can either greatly encourage or discourage someone. (I have seen this to be true countless times). I carefully & purposely try to respond to others with empathy.
Brene Brown is one of my all-time favorite people to quote when it comes to empathy. She has a short video on what empathy is that I will share below. She touches on the phrase “at least” & how it is basically the opposite of empathy.
I have done some lessons on emapthy with my students, because even if none of them grow up to be a counselor like me, learning how to express empathy is a powerful skill.
I will link to one of the empathy lessons I created here.
So, next time you start to say “at least” to others or even yourself, I hope you will remember this.
(Oh & by the way, my mom was able to find a good resource to help with that astronomically-priced medication, thank goodness)!
